Facts 'N' Theories. Did you Know!
- Sarah Louise Clarke
- Dec 10, 2023
- 6 min read
Written & Typed 09/12/2023
I find this fascinating and I'm not sure if it's fact or theory!
Sadly, a friend of mine just like myself, after having kids has ended up with multiple diagnoses of different types of disease, disorder or illness after the stress of having multiple kids or being a mum of disability.
To protect my friend, I won't mention her conditions she's been recently diagnosed with, but I shall share from my own experience and the research I stumbled upon.
From both of our experiences of severe stress of parenting, it has put tremendous pressure on our physical bodies. Our mental health barely grappling with the facts.
Isn't it strange that before marriage and kids, none of the diagnoses that my friend and I have now, were apparent beforehand!
I have heard of this with other people, but I didn't know how close it hit to home.
Chronic stress can lead to serious health issues that affect your quality of life!
The effects of chronic stress on health: new insights into the molecular mechanisms of brain–body communication - PMC (nih.gov)
Years into parenting and the chronic stress affecting our mental health has been extreme. I did counselling since high school but the frequency of sessions I've picked up over the years has increased! But I have loved all the psychologists I have met. Counselling has been helpful for me and women love to chat. I'm weird, but counselling is my regular therapy! Getting everything off your chest in a private confidential space is probably the best form of help from my experience.
A lot of my mental health came out when our daughter was born in 2015. I mentioned in an earlier post that I was diagnosed to have post-natal psychosis. Post-partum Psychosis:
Which lasted 8 months. I dont have much memory in that time frame.
Severe anxiety was very debilitating and my psychosis affected my entire family, causing relationship breakdown which thankfully has recovered. I'm much better psychologically after years of therapy and self care on my part.
Not only can our internal health be affected but physical as well.
In September 2019, I was lifting my daughter off the floor during a meltdown and did spinal damage. 4th and 5th vertebrae slipped out of alignment and squashed a disk. Pain was excruciating for over 3 months. Debiliating and affected my quality of life.
Then during the covid pandemic, I pulled my neck muscles out, to my shoulder blades. I was very stiff and couldn't keep my head up for long! As you can see muscle strain below:
Every so often I'll sleep wrong or move wrong and that's all it takes for a relapse.
Then in December this year, I've done joint and muscle injuries in my lower back. There isn't evidence on my recent x-ray to show the misaligned vertebrae which is wonderful it healed, but I have a herniated disc in the same area this round. Cause: lifting my daughter during a meltdown in a shopping carpark and moving furniture in the same week.
I now have to attend physiotherapy twice a week and do my gentle exercises 3 times a day!
Expensive but worth it. I have 2 months of physio intervention, but the plan is to strengthen my torso to prevent further relapse. And I'm excited to get more flexible too.
Physio for physical, and psychology counselling for mental health!
A previous post, I talked about self care and meditation. Filling your tank and making sure your reserves don't go empty. And if they do, refilling that tank to get back to a better self. All of this is psychologically beneficial for me to continue to be a better version of myself, so I can take care of my daughter!
I would like to know if any of the techniques I have posted has made a difference for you?!
Back to my facts & theories! I think theory also has some truths to it. It can sometimes boil down to experience, but usually when I post something, it will have some sort of fact behind it, especially if you break it down!
I could be wrong as I'm not expert. But I find Dr Google, surprisingly reliable!
We have our next ndis review coming up in a few months and as parents or carers, you can write a Carer's Impact Statement!
You state any concerns you have, how your child's disability affects your quality of life or anything that you feel your child needs but isn't in the current plan.
You can also advocate for your child in telling the NDIS how beneficial a therapy is and how you need extra funding to cater to a specific need. But you definitely need professional and specialist reports, summaries, recommendations and medical reports, such as a Paediatrician diagnosis or GP referrals to back you up! Anything to help you and your child apply for the support you need.
Writing an ndis carer statement for plan reviews. Information at NDIS Carer Statement / Impact Statement Template | MyCareSpace
I did my first CIS a few years ago and at the time, it was about needing extra physical in home support and funding to access respite. Unfortunately, a child is classified as 'parental responsibility' from early intervention to age 9.
That made it difficult to get alot of support outside of therapy impossible for years. My statement was taken into consideration and we got more Core Support Funding for vacation care holiday program, which has made a difference to my mental health. My daughter gets to have fun, be busy and active, while I could rest and have time to refill my tank reserves and that involved mostly sleep. (In between driving).
I will be doing another Carer's Impact Statement for our upcoming review. As Christina's still not ready to be toilet trained and having regular accidents, she's also swung the other way and won't wee for 24 hours. Will only wee in the shower in the evenings which we are told is normal.
We're still on the waiting list for an OT, but we found an OT who is willing to do a report to give to the ndis. She also gave us confidence as parents that we were doing the best we can. But we still need immediate support. I'll add this into my statement for the NDIS.
We also need to put in this CIS about our current struggles and for me they are:
Lower back: joint and muscle strain
Spinal injuries involving previous misaligned vertebrae (x-ray results needed)
Diagnosed High Blood Pressure, (report included)
Diagnosed auto immune diseases such as alopecia areata and eosinophilia- type of white blood cell that attacks the oesophagus and causing swelling, swallowing and choaking issues. Some cases considered life threatening.
Other conditions I read about people developing after chronic stress are: Type II Diabetes, hypertension, Throid: hyperthyroidism or hypothyroidism. Weight gain, obsesity, crohns disease, arthritis, anxiety, depression, migraines, digestive disorders and more!
While not everyone will develop an illness from chronic stress, it's amazing the research out there that does support conditions that me and other friends have gone through.
We all deal with stress in different ways and there is no right way to get support. We all do what's needed to get through the tough times and suffering with poor health!
I pray and wish for my friend to be able to find relief in some form for the illnesses she is going through. 🙏
While I don't understand the extent of her suffering, I do have an idea how chronic stress has affected my physical health, including internal illnesses affecting the inner person!
Alot of my conditions are hereditary, but it's interesting to hear how chronic stress can activate these conditions. Sometimes you can live with something hereditary, but it doesn't rear it's head until a flu virus or chronic disease triggers these receptors.
Chronic stress puts your health at risk! Fortunately, it is possible to manage and elevate chronic stress! Stress | APS (psychology.org.au)
If you are a Christian you can find support, comfort and peace in our Lord Jesus as I do! I treasure God's promises and presence during severe stress both physical, emotional and mental. His burden is easy and his yoke is light! Matthew 11 verses 28 to 30.
We can cast our anxieties and cares on him.
1 Peter 5 verse 7.
While he doesn't always take our suffering away, he promises to always be with us through it!
Much love and care to you,
Sarah Louise Clarke
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